# Ocean Sunfish vs Peacock Spider: The Biggest Doofus in the Sea Meets a 5mm Disco Ball

> A two-ton fish that looks like a head that gave up, versus a spider the size of a grain of rice that dances for its life. Scale is meaningless here.

By someone who loves to compare irrelevant things. Daily matchup.

## Contestants

### Ocean Sunfish (Mola mola)
Taxonomy: Actinopterygii > Tetraodontiformes > Molidae > Mola > M. mola
The heaviest bony fish alive, shaped like a head that quit halfway.
- COOL - Size: The heaviest bony fish on Earth, topping 2,000 kg
- WEIRD - Body: Almost no tail; it looks like the front half of a much larger fish
- GROSS - Passengers: A floating parasite hotel that surfaces so birds will pick it clean
Photo: NOAA, Public domain (Wikimedia Commons) - https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Mola_mola.jpg

### Peacock Spider (Maratus volans)
Taxonomy: Arachnida > Araneae > Salticidae > Maratus > M. volans
A 5mm jumping spider with a built-in rainbow rave.
- COOL - Display: Flips up an iridescent rainbow flap and waves its legs in a courtship dance
- WEIRD - Size: About 5 mm long; the whole show fits on a fingernail
- GROSS - Stakes: If the female is unimpressed, she may eat the dancer
Photo: Jurgen Otto, CC BY-SA 2.0 (Wikimedia Commons) - https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:MalePeacockSpider.jpg

Today's matchup has a 5,000x weight difference and somehow the little one is more intimidating. A giant bony blob that sunbathes at the surface, against a tiny arachnid with a built-in rave.

## The contenders

One is the heaviest bony fish on Earth. The other could sit on your fingernail with room to spare. Naturally, we must rank them.

## Round 1: Cool

The **peacock spider** male flips up a flap of iridescent rainbow scales on his abdomen and waves his legs in a full [courtship dance](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maratus_volans). It is, frame for frame, the most extra animal alive. The **ocean sunfish** counters by being a fish the size of a small car.

## Round 2: Weird

The sunfish looks like someone built half a fish and called it a day, because it basically is: it has almost no tail. It also lays up to 300 million eggs at once and likes to bask on its side at the surface. And you know what they say: never measure a fight in kilograms.

## Round 3: Gross

The sunfish is a floating parasite hotel; it visits the surface partly so seabirds and cleaner fish will pick the freeloaders off. The spider's risk is more personal: if the female is unimpressed by the dance, she may simply eat the performer.

## Winner: Peacock Spider
The ocean sunfish is the more impressive number on paper: heaviest bony fish, millions of eggs, the silhouette of a swimming dinner plate. But cool, weird, and gross is the bracket, and a 5mm spider that risks being eaten to perform an iridescent leg-waving rave is simply doing more with less. The **peacock spider** wins. Respect the disco.

## FAQ

### Is the ocean sunfish really the heaviest bony fish?
Yes. Adult Mola species are the heaviest bony fish known, with large individuals reaching over 2,000 kg. Sharks and rays get heavier, but they are cartilaginous, not bony.

### Why does the male peacock spider dance?
It is courtship. The male raises a colorful abdominal flap and waves his third pair of legs to win over a female. If she is not impressed, she may attack or eat him, so the stakes are real.

## Sources
- Ocean sunfish: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ocean_sunfish
- Maratus volans (peacock spider): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maratus_volans

Tags: Actinopterygii, Arachnida, Molidae, Salticidae, totally-random

Canonical: https://lamalo.blog/ocean-sunfish-vs-peacock-spider